I was looking at BIFF programs, and came across this wonderful demonstration of the fact that geeks understand the word “useful” in a completely different way to the rest of the world.

tkbiff is yet another program to alert you to incoming mail. tkbiff allows arbitrary commands to be executed upon mail reception. If you like programs like xbiff++ but wish they were more flexible, then you’ll like tkbiff. For example, suppose you want to play your favorite song when you get mail that mentions “windsurfing” but play a groan when you get mail from your manager unless you’re mentioned in the cc in which case don’t play anything. This kind of thing is easy to do with tkbiff.

Someone has Too Much Time.